The George Carlin Theory

by Stephen Mills on November 30, 2011

I found this in a book a reader recommended called S.U.M.O (Shut Up, Move On): The Straight Talking Guide to Creating and Enjoying a Brilliant Life.  I thought it was funny and I think you will too.

The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends …

I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time and what do you get at the end of it?  Death!  I mean, what’s that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards:

You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you move to an old age home. You get kicked out when you’re too young, you get a gold watch and then you go to work.

You work forty years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You have fun, you party plenty, and then you get ready for senior high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities.  Then you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating … and you finish off as an orgasm.

— Unknown Author

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{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

Tenny November 30, 2011 at 9:15 pm

Now i am more familiar with The George Carlin Theory and I am thankful for this post…Great job!!
Tenny´s last blog post ..How to Deal With The Xbox 360 3 Red Ring Problem

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Weston December 1, 2011 at 9:50 am

Glad you put “unknown author” at the end because this is one of many quotes regularly mis-attributed to George Carlin.

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Justin | Personal Growth December 2, 2011 at 12:39 pm

Hi Stephen,
Hilarious and so true. Did Carlin say that or was it an unknown Author?
Justin | Personal Growth´s last blog post ..Salt and Fluoride are Killers for Spiritual Growth

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Francoise December 5, 2011 at 8:33 am

What a theory! It really made me laugh at the end.. So we were really came out from orgasms? Haha.. Seriously, I agree to this article.. Whether we like it or not.. at the end, we can’t stop it, but all of us our ending is death.. So sad, but it’s true.
Francoise´s last blog post ..My Arowana Is Not Eating No Matter What I Do !!!

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Lucy Trim August 20, 2012 at 12:44 am

Hi Carlin. Thanks for sharing your theory.
Lucy Trim´s last blog post ..Impotence and Natural Herbs that Help Men Improve Their Erection

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cyndi Valerino April 13, 2013 at 4:51 pm

I believe ( I may be wrong) that Woody Allen said it. George C

arlin used it

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