Good point here and the funny thing is that there will be people who will actually get offended by this very same article. Just hope that they give themselves a chance to understand it. Well written post.
.-= Sunny Jamiel´s last blog ..Life, Circles and the Shift =-.

Especially with your point that being offended is the way that people often attempt to control other people. It’s one of the things that led me to write my post on ‘crazymakers’ a couple of weeks ago.

There is a woman I’m acquainted with. Everyone around her will tell you how nice and wonderful she is. But as you look more closely, she is controlling the entire scene and everyone in it. She most often does this through use of a non-specific ‘condition’ combined with being easily offended and easily upset — which leads people around her to constantly walk on eggshells and stay on edge. No one wants to upset her. After all, she’s so nice.

But being offended?
It reminds me of that old quote about getting angry. Something along the lines of….”resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” The offender experienced the event. If they were looking for a particular reaction, they got the reaction they wanted. And they’ve moved on.

Thanks for another great post, Stephen!
All the best!
deb
.-= Deb Owen´s last blog ..when being productive doesn’t work (finding your purpose) =-.

Being offended is, indeed, victimizing the self and expressing one’s having been “offended” is seeking to silence that which they don’t want to have to hear, that which they don’t want to see.

Freedom is not freedom unless it’s the freedom to hear & see that which you may have to hear & see.

It is the development of personal responsibility to manage one’s life toward avoidance or indulgence of life and all it has to offer.

Instead of an individual being offended, transform the experience into observation of self and asking the self, “why would I choose to be offended?”

The answer usually gets defined: Because I want to control what others are doing or saying.

All life is selective & subjective to the individual; the source for deciding morals/values is as vast as the stars in the universe; everyone wants their way.

Cheers! Great Article. Bravo!

I don’t like people who are getting upset out of nothing. I just don’t, I do my best to avoid or ignore. Life is beautiful.

really like how you say,”forget about being offended… none of that really matters.”

…so true that some people really get off on being offended. they like to be the victim. seems to me like they easily get offended just so they can fight back and be the hero. like the reason people let themselves be controlled – so they can control back. the reason people seek a lack of security – so they can win it back. a constant push pull with reality.

funny annecdote about your 7th grade history teacher

what you react to says a lot about you.

really cool stuff, well written and awesome message
gave it a stumble

all the best
alex – unleash reality
.-= Alex – unleash reality´s last blog ..Sound-Bite Sized Self-Help =-.

But I agree with what you said. In fact, I just had heard a great story about offenses. The Greek word for offenses can be translated to ‘scandalon’. Scandalon is a trap for animals where the prey lands in a pit with pointed stakes that pierces their flesh and paralyzes them.

It’s a great analogy, in that if we get offended, we get paralyzed, the pain stays and (the saddest thing is) we cannot move on in life.

Maturity comes when we accept the fact that we live in an imperfect world and that offenses will surely come; that we should not let offenses affect us; or when they do affect us, we quickly forgive and let it go.
.-= Charles´s last blog ..Are you Brain-Dumping or Communicating? =-.

“…but I think this is one of those places where we’re probably going to differ in thought no matter what.”

I think you are right. On the other hand I’m suspecting your idea of my position is missing a lot of subtleties. Unfortunately, you can’t articulate all of those in a blog post. It’s not like I ignore my impact on others because I don’t. I don’t go around intentionally irritating or offending people. The principle argument of my article was not the actions of the offender, but the actions of the offendee – the victim. We are now talking about our responsibilities as offenders which would require a different article.

Finally, to make a point you can’t say take a middle position or you are basically saying nothing. Your point has to be somewhere on the edge. My positions generally are on the edge and obviously much more so than yours. However, I suspect they are not nearly as black and white as you are getting from all of this.